• wildncrazyguy138@fedia.io
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    20 days ago

    My wife and I had a good snicker one time when I brought home edamame peas in the shell.

    They were shelled, but she wanted them shelled.

    Flammable/imflammable is another one that comes to mind.

    • merc@sh.itjust.works
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      19 days ago

      English has many contronyms.

      • Clip: to attach (clip X to Y) or detach (clip coupons)
      • Dust: to remove dust or to add it (dust the cake with icing sugar)
      • Fine: excellent (fine wine) or not great but decent (it’s fine)
      • Left: remaining (I have 5 left) or gone (I had some but they left)
      • Oversight: supervision (he had oversight over the whole process) or lack of supervision (I forgot to do that, it was an oversight)
  • pruwyben@discuss.tchncs.de
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    20 days ago

    Bought, caught, taught, fought, thought, sought, and wrought are all past tense verbs and all rhyme. The present tense forms are buy, catch, teach, fight, think, seek, and work, none of which rhyme.

    • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today
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      20 days ago

      This is the grammar thing I fuck up the most, and I don’t call people on it because I’m pretty sure I don’t know how it works. Autocorrect changes it & I just say “oh, whoops”, and it still looks wrong…

      • HugeNerd@lemmy.ca
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        20 days ago

        it’s means “it is”. It is really not difficult, just pretend you are Data and swear off contractions.

        • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today
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          20 days ago

          I think the contraction vs possesive thing messes with me, and my brain can never settle on what goes where when, how, or why…

          • amelia@feddit.org
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            20 days ago

            Just try changing it to “it is”. If the sentence still makes sense, it’s “it’s”. Otherwise it’s “its”.

      • everett@lemmy.ml
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        19 days ago

        Here’s a shortcut: test if you could drop “his” into the same spot and have it make sense. (And of course you’d never write hi’s or his’s.) If “his” would work, “its” would work.

      • wols@lemmy.zip
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        20 days ago

        My keyboard is very keen on completing “it’s” regardless of context. I imagine this is the case for most people, since usually I see “it’s” when “its” would be correct.

        I also think it’s difficult to know that “it’s” is wrong to use because it feels like it follows the common apostrophe for possession rule:
        “Australia’s capital is Canberra” -> “Australia is the largest country in Oceania. It’s capital is Canberra.” (wrong, but intuitive)

  • afk_strats@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    The Chaos by Gerard Nolst Trenité (1922)

    https://ncf.idallen.com/english.html

    Dearest creature in creation
    Studying English pronunciation,
    I will teach you in my verse
    Sounds like corpse, corps, horse and worse.

    I will keep you, Susy, busy,
    Make your head with heat grow dizzy;
    Tear in eye, your dress you’ll tear;
    Queer, fair seer, hear my prayer.

    Pray, console your loving poet,
    Make my coat look new, dear, sew it!
    Just compare heart, hear and heard,
    Dies and diet, lord and word.

    Very long. Highly recommended

  • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    It’s because the people who set the rules for the English language, could barely speak it.

    The first guy to popularize the printing press was Dutch, so the guy who bought England’s first one didn’t know how it worked and neither did any English speaker

    So he hired a bunch of Dutch who knew how to operate it.

    And they got a bunch of handwritten books and were told to mass reproduce them.

    Sometimes it was a mistake in the original, sometimes the typesetter made a mistake. Sometimes the writer just disagreed with how it should be written, and sometimes even the typesetters who couldn’t speak English made choices to change it

    No one gave a fuck about accuracy, it was about pumping out as many books as possible. Because just owning a book was a huge status symbol still from when they were handwritten and crazy expensive.

    But all those books eventually got read, and the people who learned to read them were very proud that they could read. So they insisted that all the random bullshit was intentional and had to be followed to a T by everyone forever.

    Most other languages had a noble class who kept it sensical, but for a long ass time only peasants spoke English, the wealthy in England all spoke French, cuz they were French.

    Anyways, that’s why English doesn’t make any sense. There was also a natural thing happening where vowel pronunciation was changing. So when the typecasters solidified everything, it was already in a state of flux. That’s why pronunciation doesn’t line up with spelling.

      • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        Yep…

        There was also a natural thing happening where vowel pronunciation was changing. So when the typecasters solidified everything, it was already in a state of flux. That’s why pronunciation doesn’t line up with spelling.

    • AwesomeLowlander@sh.itjust.works
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      20 days ago

      It certainly doesn’t help that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don’t just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.

    • Nikls94@lemmy.world
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      20 days ago

      A French. The language where you have 5 wovels, use 3 for the word goose and the other 2 to pronounce it.

          • alsimoneau@lemmy.ca
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            18 days ago

            It’s really not. Maybe if you pronounce an English ‘u’, but not a French one. Source: I’m French Canadian.

          • merc@sh.itjust.works
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            19 days ago

            If you look at an IPA chart, you can see how going from /i/ to /e/ to /a/ is a process of the vowel becoming more and more “open” over time (said with the mouth wider and wider).

            In Quebec, the vowel shift that caused “oi” to have a /wa/ sound didn’t fully happen. So, the word “moi” is often pronounced more like /mwe/ or /mwɛ/. But “oiseau” (bird) is still pronounced with a /wa/.

            The modern French pronunciation of the Loire river /lwaʁ/ influences the English pronunciation /lwɑːr/. But, other languages use a spelling that matches the French but have a different pronunciation. In Italian and Spanish it’s Loira. The Latin name was Liger. So, it used to have a /i/ pronunciation before the vowel shift.

            tl;dr: modern French pronunciation vs spelling is just about as bad as English.

      • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        More like if the French royalty hadn’t conquered England…

        England hasn’t been ruled by the English for centuries bro

          • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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            19 days ago

            When people shit on the English, it’s usually for stuff a small group of French royalty/oligarchs were doing. And they were doing bad shit to the actual English too.

            Like the joke about “robbed the world for spices, used zero”.

            The royalty 100% used all the fancy spices and sold them to their cousins in mainland Europe. But the common Englishman sure as fuck couldn’t afford them.

            The most shit we should be giving the common English, is for not following the common French’s example

        • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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          20 days ago

          On the other hand, you seldom have the issue of having no clue how something is pronounced because you’ve only ever seen it written. So it balances out.

    • cabillaud@lemmy.world
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      19 days ago

      The first guy to popularize the printing press was Dutch

      Are you talking about Johannes Gutenberg?

  • Treczoks@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    Where, were, we’re. Even native speakers have problems with this. I don’t know how many times I had to correct such cases, especially with American authors.

    • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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      20 days ago

      Pretty much only native speakers have problems with this, I see this type of mistake far less frequently with those who learned English as an additional language.

      • Samskara@sh.itjust.works
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        20 days ago

        Exactly. People with English as a second language go from meaning to writing. Native speakers go from sound to writing.

        There, their, they’re is something native speakers confuse as well. I have only ever observed native speaker write should of instead of should‘ve or should have.

      • Bloomcole@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        Pretty much only native speakers have problems with this

        That makes no sense since they would use it more, however native speakers from the US do have problems with it, and other words (they’re/their).

        Rarely encounter it with others.
        Their spelling is embarrassing, same as their very limited vocabulary. IDK what they do in schools.

        • bigfondue@lemmy.world
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          20 days ago

          Native speakers acquire the language before learning to read. Remember, writing is a representation of spoken language not the other way round.

          • bigfondue@lemmy.world
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            20 days ago

            No it is. People were speaking for tens of thousands of years before they started writing. Modern people wee the written word as more valid than spoken, but it’s a historical quirk that words pronounced identically should be spelled differently in English. Words that are spelled differently in English were once pronounced differently as well, but languages change and our spelling system is frozen in the 1600s.

            • Bloomcole@lemmy.world
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              20 days ago

              Modern people are the written word as more valid than spoken

              Now there’s a sentence I can’t make sense of.

              There is no influence of history in when kids learn to write their language or if they used it orally, they learn to write it then how it’s supposed to be written.
              If your reasons were valid every Anglo would have problems, they don’t.
              Since it’s noticably the US specifically I can only assume it’s sub standard education.
              As confirmed by their poor vocabulary compared to other Anglo’s

      • Treczoks@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        Pretty much only native speakers have problems with this

        99% agree with this. This is a native speaker issue, except where someone took up bad habits from the natives…

    • mapu@slrpnk.net
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      20 days ago

      I pronounce these all differently though? [wɛɹ], [wəɹ] and [wiɹ]

      • Treczoks@lemmy.world
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        20 days ago

        Maybe, yes, but as someone who has seen tons of unedited writings, I can tell you those mixup as common as muck.

    • ulterno@programming.dev
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      20 days ago

      Where, were, we’re.

      I never had a problem with those, until I started with stuff like Reddit.

      Now, I find myself making the mistake and catching it in proofreading.
      Guess my brain is starting to age too.

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
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      20 days ago

      How did I get to the lead merchant? I was led here. But in the price negotiation, I took the lead.

      • CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org
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        19 days ago

        All of them. If you speak some weird rural UK accent you spell it differently. And certain people from New York, for example, spell curl as coil.

        I think this would be the same in RP as it is in most American-ish accents, though.