I really want the job of “head receiver,” like Jerry here.

I was a noodle ambassador, once upon a time.

Worked in printing before things were phased to computers and had to shoot/cut out negatives on a light table for the press plates. It was called “stripping”. So, I was a stripper once without taking off any clothes.

Pharmacists are drug dealers. At least I call them that. 😁

Chief Trainee.

Context: The hierarchy at this job I once had (and still kind of have) went like this:
First, the four departments:
Technician, Navigator, Mechanic, Processor.

The structure: Trainee tech/nav/mech/proc -> tech/nav/mech/proc ->
Shift Leader tech/nav/mech/proc ->
Chief tech/nav/mech/proc ->
Party Chief

This one guy we hired was good at what he did, and he had years of experience from a different company. He was hired with the understanding that he’d take on the chief role after some time.

However, HR stupidity dictated that a certain duration with the company was required for various levels, so he had to start as a trainee. And pay was also linked to this, and he was supposed to be paid as a chief.

So I as a shift lead at that time had him working under me as Chief Trainee so he could learn our methods and systems before he got into the role as my Chief.

Customer experience architect. The person with that job is an insufferable asshole.

I laughed out loud when I saw someone I know on LinkedIn convert from real estate agent to ‘prompt engineer’

In some industries, the safety officer in charge is usually called the “competent person”.

Maybe this doesn’t count but… I once had a manager who had “Master of All He Surveys” on his business card.

We didn’t get a long too well.

I worked with a guy who was Happiness Officer and all my friends found it hilarious. He was pretty good at keeping the team happy though so I didn’t give him too much shit about it.

I was being recruited to design and develop a machine that sorted bull semen into male and female and I half jokingly said I’d consider it if i could have the title of Sr Semen Sorter and manager said ok. COVID stopped the project though

“Thinker” is probably the most obnoxious one I’ve heard of, from the CTO of a tech company

If I remember reading some old Mac magazine correctly, Guy Kawasaki’s official job title at Apple was “Intergalactic Evangelist”.

The weirdest I’ve ever had was “Keyholder”.

My ex briefly had the title of “Bioethicist”.