cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/28523918
This made me laugh incredibly hard, so had to cross post it.
Y’all would have killed Jesus.
fun fact… killing jesus was always god’s plan. god set adam and eve up in the garden specifically so he could LARP as a Nice Guy™. In fact, not killing jesus would have condemned humanity to eternal suffering, and therefore would have been sin. Not that anyone had a choice, because it’s all part of god’s plan, right, and god’s plan always comes to fruition.
If you believe in that sort of thing.
I don’t.
you say that now but when the (checks current feelings are still, oh good) flames of (checks notebook on latest revisions, hahah stupid assholes) HELL are kissing your feet while a succubus sits on your face and… ok brb this is fuckin hot…
If God is real, he’s evil.
That’s why I’m an atheist. I’m too optimistic.
The Abrahamic god is literally a war god. It evolved from El and Yahweh, members of the pantheon of the polytheistic Canaanite religion. El is the father of all gods and Yahweh is a weather and war god. So yeah no wonder that the Abrahamic god does crazy evil shit. Like killing all first born sons.
Fortunately; if god is real he got bored with this particular video game and moved onto some thing more exciting.
Doesn’t the Bible go on and on about how the devil is the great deceiver? Seems accurate considering how many people think God was the good guy.
Should we tell her there’ll be another Pope, or is it funnier to let her keep believing?
She was likely against the somewhat liberal views of Pope Francis, like how Christians should be kind to gay people and refugees.
Heretic!
Even the pope is just a church organ. I meant, his “policy” if you will was more than just his own. It’s doubtful that Vance’s visit (I will run with the idea*) will bring forth a more conservative pope.
* “Rep. Nancy Mace (…) bizarrely insisted that a visit by U.S. Vice President JD Vance did not lead to the pope’s death.”
I’m very afraid that the next pope will be somebody American catholic bishops would approve of. a trans hating, immigrant-hating asshole who will excuse everything Nazi America does like that one nazi pope did historically
80% of the conclave was appointed by the Pope. I doubt it’s gonnabe a radical chnge in the Vatican.
Do you seriously think the Vatican is influenced by MAGA? Or by European far-right elements for that matter?
It’s no coincidence, no outlier, that the last one was slightly more tolerant on certain issues. (Apparently enough to piss off more than one US christofascist.) I fear MTG will not see God’s plan in whatever follows, either.
Do you seriously think they’re not?
Do you really think the cia/nsa doesn’t have compromat? Or that Putin doesn’t?
Or that rich fucks like musk can’t buy a priest?
Are you really so confident the organization that made a deliberate effort to protect men who sexually assaulted children is going to do the right thing because it’s the right thing?l
But the next pope may be far more conservative than Francis, who by Catholic Church standards was unusually liberal.
Hopefully one that pisses hateful bigots like her off even more.
#ZendayaForPope
This is the result of 40 years of Jerry Springer, Judge Judy, Rush Limbaugh, and all the other Right Wing Grifters that followed.
They know the lowest of us love cruelty as comedy.
And for some odd reason they are avid voters.
Because they want to belong to “The Team.”
Let’s not forget Alex Jones, still holding on with this bare teeth claiming “The State” is after him. (heard a curated interview with Fucker Carlson yesterday, what a cringefest)
Is this what a good Christian sounds like?
Oh face of evil,
Oh Marjorie Trailer Queen,
The evil you know,
Is the evil you’ve seen.
Oh face of spite,
A reflection so mean,
The ugliest sight,
Is the one you preen.
Oh face of shame,
A soul so obscene,
The monster you blame,
Is the one you’ve been.
now, all you motherfuckers, i wanna hear you scream!!!
at least, that’s how i’d have ended it
Next week:
Margarine Trailer Queen: “What do you mean there’s another pope?!”
She probably will call it a “pop”
is there currently an antipope?
(edit, apparently there’s 3. lol.)
Like a hammer hits a cantaloupe.
Like a lion eats an antelope…
No more rhyming now! I mean it!
The people in the white house are talking more and more like gaudy villains from 90’s anime.
Classy as always. MAGA is a movement of societal breakdown.
I’m pretty sure she lost all respect a long time ago
Has anyone thought to test her for rabies yet?
Removed by mod
(Once in a while, I start a joke only to realize it’ll take 4 or 5 interactions for the punchline to not involve the FBI knocking on my door with a battering ram. Don’t have the patience for it at this moment.)
She’s up for reelection Nov 3, 2026.
I mean, even without the political angle she’d still say this. She’s not Catholic so the concept of a pope is already blasphemous. Christians warring amongst themselves is normal.
Vultures.
It’s an alt-right social media trend: descend on the dead before they’re even cold.
That said, MTG is still dumb as bricks. Says a lot about MAGA, what type of women they bring forth. Sorry if that sounds sexist - or if, the sexism is not mine.