One of my new friends is/was a cop. Just found out about it. I genuinely believe ACAB, and this news has me conflicted because my new friend seems really cool and super nice. I don’t know him super well yet, though. He’s a big part of this new friend group and I don’t know how to process this and how to deal with the fact he’s a cop.
I don’t want to look past the fact he’s a cop, but I want to stay his friend and stay in this friend group.
Any advice for dealing with this shit?
I can’t talk to my therapist about it until Thursday.
I genuinely believe ACAB, and this news has me conflicted because my new friend seems really cool and super nice.
What you’re experiencing is cognitive dissonance. New information is clashing with your prior beliefs, leaving you with a choice: either update your beliefs or double down and lie to yourself even harder.
Seems like maybe reality is at odds with a generalization. Maybe every cop is not a bastard, every landlord is not an oppressive monster, and every person who makes more money than you is not a net drain on society.
Maybe you have just discovered something rare and elusive: nuance.
This post reads like a lefty caricature by someone hard right, esp the last sentence.
Thanks for some sanity here. Some of these comments are really bizarre.
Look, I get that the system is shitty and corrupt. I don’t condone that and I agree it needs to change. But that doesn’t mean that every single individual is a terrible person. Some people are too chronically online to understand that life is not black and white.
deleted by creator
Develop a more complex and articulated theory of the problems with American policing than “ACAB”. That’s a four word model of reality.
Shit’s complex.
This is one of many problems with “ACAB” because not every cop is one way or the other.
Reality is that a functioning society needs police officers. It sounds like you hit it off with this person and they have some good qualities that you like.
How do you expect the police to change if we don’t get involved? Getting rid of the police entirely is not a solution. But getting in and making changes from the inside is a valid way to make things better.
Why are you wanting to create an echo chamber for yourself? Why don’t you expose yourself to others and other ideas that are different than yours? What’s the harm there? Are you scared you won’t be able to change his mind or that his ideas might make some sense to you?
I have a couple of friends in law enforcement (NYPD & state Police). They tend to be best cops around, one of them is being sent to be a trainer so he can get some bigger promotions.
You got to ask yourself and maybe them if they are a good person. All cops are bad because of what the system does to them. But who they are in spite of what that system is doing says more about who they are as a person.
Chances are they’ll have edgy jokes, but you’ve been on the Internet long enough to end up here, so I’m sure you can navigate that.
Remember conservatives hate liberal arts colleges because people who are exposed to diversity are more tolerant of it.
