I, just wanna stop feeling anything. Never had friends but I could live with that, but I just want someone to embrace, someone that feels something for me, even if doesn’t last. Better than 0 for the rest of my life. This situation is slowly killing me.
The only thing that gives me some relief is gaming… (I read the post of like a week ago here that several dudes met their partner thanks to a videogame and I felt even sadder, why that wasn’t me? I’ve been gaming for 30 years now).
Yes. Sure; and most are too shell -shocked to accept that, at first. I certainly was, at least. In my personal opinion, most of us need a little nurturing and time to allow spiritual bones to knit back together a bit first, so the elementary work offers a brief respite from the hamster wheel until we become able to work through the 12th year coursework and get off the wheel. I guess post secondary learns how to stay off the wheel for extended periods, and post grad is a whole other wheel we choose, for self-development in appropriate levels for appropriate times.
There a balance between being gentle and mollycoddling, and each individual and circumstance dictate that balance. And as always, “new levels, new devil’s.” Ourselves being the first, middle, last pit boss, always. We just use others as mirrors and kid ourselves about it, sometimes, for funnies and development, in equal measure. The really neat trick for me, is learning how to STAY PRESENT, in the present moment, especially when it’s painful, because that’s where I’ll find the most answers, doing the homework. In the end, that’s justice, and the difference between karma and dharma has just as often seemed to be in millimeters, as often, if not more often, than light years.