I, just wanna stop feeling anything. Never had friends but I could live with that, but I just want someone to embrace, someone that feels something for me, even if doesn’t last. Better than 0 for the rest of my life. This situation is slowly killing me.
The only thing that gives me some relief is gaming… (I read the post of like a week ago here that several dudes met their partner thanks to a videogame and I felt even sadder, why that wasn’t me? I’ve been gaming for 30 years now).
I will tell you that at least initially you shouldn’t be looking for a partner/SO. Just try finding someone (online or real life) regardless of gender to do some activity that you both enjoy together. Don’t be a weirdo, creepy, edgy, simp, nice guy, that will help ya, but also look on how to have conversations, have some good sense of humour, and be an emotionally aware and empathetic person. Ask for and set expectations/boundaries. And try to enjoy what you’re both doing. And remember, love is not enough.