Like she said “just come with us and the “喜氣” is gonna get rid of your depression”
Holy shit wtf?
Last time I went 2 hours to some stupid holiday family gathering dinner thing, it was MISERABLE, and my aunt’s kids be drooling over the fucking food and it was nasty as fuck, I think I got food poisoning last time.
Like I don’t even know this random cousin lol, we don’t even live in the same city, why the fuck did they even invite us to be a guest in their stupid wedding ceromony, like, I ain’t your friend lol. I don’t wanna go and have a panic attack wtf.
Fine, you believe your shit, I’m Jesus’s second son then, and I’m gonna lead people to create God’s kingdom (/obvious sarcasm)
What the fuck. Is there mass hysteria right now? How do these people exist? Wtf.
Honestly, this probably explains people supporting conservatism.
Like do I go to this stupid thing so I can prove my mother wrong? I’m gonns get more anxiety after this stupid event.
Like I don’t even like the cuisine, last time I went to a cousin’s “Sweet 16” when I was a kid, I HATED IT, the food SUCKED.
I don’t know how your “soul clensing” spiritualism is even supposed to work when the reality is, I will have a panic attack.
Sorry for the rant, I’m just so… bewildered at this stupid belief of “soul clensing” what the fuck?!?
We don’t live in the same city. Under this current economic system, there’s hardly time to meet relatives 2+ hours of driving distance away.
That’s not the point. You’re free (or at least your mum is) to turn down the invitation with an excuse. They however are obligated to invite you else they’d be considered rude (again, under Chinese culture).
I grew up in the west, I didn’t bother learning about what “traditions” there are, because the way I see it, its a bunch of outdated BS that’s patriarchal, misogynistic, and toxic masculinity.
The only reason why I was even born was because my parents expect me to fund their retirement, but I’ve already gottem so tired of being controlled by them. I had to go the “after school” programs ever since like 2nd grade, and most days I was in school from 7AM all the way to 6PM when you factor in the after school BS. Its always those Chinese-American organizations where child abuse runs rampant because those volunteers basically go unchecked. That’s been the way for my entire time in New York City. And also the fucking SUMMER school programs. I’ve been in school more than I was at home during my waking hours basically. I’m so fucking exhausted. Every time we go visit NYC, its ALWAYS arguments with grandparents about stuff. NYC is plagued with horrible memories. Now I’m basically coerced to go.
So I have to deal with:
(I’m typing this while my mood is very bad, sorry I didn’t mean to sound agressive, I’m just having a breakdown right now because this is stressing me out. I can’t afford to burn bridges with parents since authoritarianism is looming and economy is shit, I don’t wanna end up homeless, but I also can’t deal with fucking NYC. Fuck my life, really just wanna jump off a fucking bridge, its so painful.)
A lot of it is, but in that sense it’s probably no different from traditions anywhere else. Pretty much all traditional cultures are patriarchal, etc. to some extent. We just observe it more closely in the ones we grow up with.
As a parent myself, I gotta tell you the math does not check out on that one. Bringing up a kid is a huge expense. It sounds like you didn’t have the best childhood, but I assure you your parents didn’t have you just to fund their retirement. Whether they’re expecting it is an entirely different matter (you probably know this very well, but for the others reading this, Asian expectations are that parents invest 100% in their children’s future with no savings of their own, with the understanding that the children will in turn be responsible for the parents once they’re too old to work). Unfortunately it doesn’t sound like you’re very close to your parents, so it seems they kinda dropped the ball on taking care of you emotionally.
My advice would be, try to take a step back. In the grand scheme of things, dressing up and attending a dinner is a pretty minor issue. You don’t have to like it, but learning to suffer through situations you’re not personally loving is essentially part of adulting. Try to find your moments of enjoyment during the event where you can.