Tucker Carlson is “fake straight” and should answer questions about being straight.
He does seem very interested in gay sex.
I love this concept. Tucker Carlson just being this closeted gay man, who’s rejected by his own people, and can’t come out as gay. So he just flirts in the worst way possible.
“Yeah? You gay? Yeah? Talk about it! Answer all the questions I have about what butt stuff is like!”
Meanwhile everyone else is just confused as hell.
Soutpark needs to redo the “Tom Cruise won’t come out of the closet” skit with the Tuckster.
The Tuchus
He kinda just looks it too. I know that’s highly assumptions and shallow, but the gaydar has always gone off. Good skin, well-conditioned 80s dad hair, always dressed tidy but a little loose, definitely pays attention to his colours, good clothing combos and shoe choices too…
Like, just the article’s pic, if you didn’t know what Tucker looked like and had to guess who the bigot was in this pic…
I bet he gets around his house in cut-offs because he likes the comfort of shorts but denim is a real man’s material.
or he’s a nevernude
He needs a pair of these
its in the eyes and nope
No one talks more about gay sex than homophobes. I am bi and I think about penises less than Tucker Carlson
How it feels around dudes who see you enjoy a caramel latte instead of drinking it black for some reason. Like bro, some Italian grandma drinks espresso harder than you ever have.
Some Italian grandmas are harder than they will ever be too.
Thicker mustaches, too.
Tucker will confim from his own experience?
No way he would turn down a stallion like me, thought Tucker. He must be faking it!
Tucker’s always there for the analysis.
True, no-bullshit journalism!
Tell us what it’s like being a “fake straight”, Tucker.
It’s more likely he’s a real straight, but no good at it.
Definitely gives off some incel vibes, I can see it.
I mean if you haven’t seen the weird tucker Carlson thing with a bunch of greased up men in it uh idk man I don’t even remember what it was but boy does it make me not question that he understands what gay is… but uhhhhh it sure sounds like tucker just wants Pete to prove it by sucking his dick and is mad that he won’t.
Hey,
Thanks, and I don’t think I have to watch it anymore!
So, what we’re saying is…
he “will be caught buying crack from a gay prostitute going, ‘we were just playing tummy swords.’ And then he’ll deny it going, ‘I did not perform a homosexual act.’ ‘no, you didn’t. Elton John is a homosexual act. You just blew that guy. It’s okay.’” -Robin Williams
No, Tucker, he still won’t have sex with you. Not because he’s not gay, but because you are a boner killer.
“I did gay to be cool and popular. President, maybe!”
– not gay PeteI think we are all wondering one thing that Pete might be able to answer.
“When two gay men have sex, how do they know who’s penis will open up to accept the other person’s penis?”
-Dwight Schrute
Angela slowly nodding in the background
No Tucker, you first.
What a weird thing to say.
Masculine manly Republican men stop thinking about gay sex challenge (impossible).
This man is so far in the closet, he’s inside a closet in a random house in Narnia.
The fuck does he know about sex? His name is Tucker.
What a weird take to say out loud.
Sounds like Tucker wants to get topped.
