The butter won’t make him fat but the pasta will.

If you’re browsing Lemmy, on your phone, in work then really you should be curating your feed a bit better.

Just have to make our globe working model dense enough to distort space-time and then spin it at a thousand miles an hour. 'Course this will require a working model of the sun to power the working model of the Earth.

I sure hope so.

Much as I find it difficult to sympathise with bureaucracies, can’t help but feel the Frivolous Returns dept. might be the alter-ego of the ‘Now, Don’t Be A Cunt’ department.

Dear Sir/Madam

We wrote to you upon receipt of your tax return informing you that it had been passed to our Frivolous Returns department for further examination. That examination is now complete.

It is with regret that we have to inform you that you are clown shoes. We think it is possible that the doctor may have mistakenly certified a placenta in your case.

As unlikely as it seems that you are actually earning a taxable income you should probably pass this matter over to a competent adult to help you with the self-assessment process.

Clown shoes, bud.

Alvis Connaught Frivolous Returns, Inland Revenue Service

I mean, if there were a serious prospect of winning it would pay for itself. Unfortunately it would probably involve the Supreme Court paying for itself.

I’m guessing that pretty much no one would be allowed to beat a credit card company in court, it would open too big a can of worms.

At least it would enable the sovcits to see what a magic get out of jail free card actually looks like from the front row.

I’m not an American so I don’t know if this is possible but could not a lawyer start a class action using all the sovereign citizens as complainants against a credit card company on the basis that said company did not do their due diligence before issuing cards to people so unhinged they couldn’t possibly have entered into a contract with someone that required informed consent?

I feel like putting these people on the stand for about five minutes each would give ample supporting evidence of the proposition.

Back in the day you would have asked for a flattop.

You could always save a picture to your phone and then ask them to do that. They’ll probably still ask if the length is alright but it’s up to you to instruct them from there.

Man, fuck that site. Won’t allow you to decline cookies.

A site-blocking law would let copyright owners “request, in court, that Internet service providers block access to websites dedicated to sharing illegal, stolen content,” he said. Rivkin claimed that in the US, piracy “steals hundreds of thousands of jobs from workers and tens of billions of dollars from our economy rich people’s yacht money, including more than one billion in theatrical ticket sales.”

I miss the old rotten library. Iain M. Banks too.

See I knew I needed to up the dosage to outcrazy L. Ron. Have you ever read Bare Faced Messiah? It’s quite long and repetitive (tl;dr: Ron lied. A lot. About everything.) but the bit about his naval career is quite entertaining.

What if, now hear me out, what if the entire planet is a witch sacrifice altar where beings from other dimensions are sent and incorporated as humans and they live their lives full of confusion, suffering and pain and then they all have to die and that collective sacrifice feeds the pan-dimensional deity that lives beyond the black hole known as the Great Annihilator?

This is just monetising incels, isn’t it?

https://allthatsinteresting.com/truth-behind-excalibur

For shits and giggles, obviously.