Shell shocked mosquito: There is a land lads, bristling with barbed wire so thick ye see not sun nor moon. Where ye go in to feed but may never return.

Imagine him missing and shooting the inventor in the nards.

In paint be sure to make a bunch of random lines and then use the fill bucket to fill in random colors in the spaces.

That one mushy moldy strawberry that snuck in: “Now to corrupt the entire batch! Muhahaha!””

Awww yeah. And then I’ll say, “Good heavens!”

I just want to wear a tux, a monocle, and some large medals while gossiping about the aristocracy.

This is exactly why I don’t want to go to kangaroo prison.

Being destroyed by a giant machine is terrible but it did file the proper paperwork first so what can be done at this point?

Spin up a VM with windows 95 and try again.

Bro I SSH directly into the jpg using Microsoft Paint.

Me: I need to go to sleep.
Also me: This 3 hour video about islands in the shape of dogs looks interesting.

The terrorists are gonna either think here’s another British agent, or it’s McLovin the 25 year old organ donor.

Weekend at Chase Manhattan.

Dear IRS,

How are you? I am well. I paid my tax already when I bought gum at the Gas N Go, and it was 78 cents.

Your pal,
saltnotsugar

And the people came out of the city of Jerusalem, and beheld a bunny laying eggs of many colors. Many were confused, for the eggs were then hidden, within them, candies from leading brands. Hippitus Hoppitus.

Hohoho. Mew meow mow Solo.

Get yourself a clown girlfriend. Or don’t. What do I know?

Do you moo, sir?

I do moo.

But do you moo at ME, sir?!

This dame was a vampire, and flew in on the five fifteen.

WAT.