Weekend at Chase Manhattan.

Dear IRS,

How are you? I am well. I paid my tax already when I bought gum at the Gas N Go, and it was 78 cents.

Your pal,
saltnotsugar

And the people came out of the city of Jerusalem, and beheld a bunny laying eggs of many colors. Many were confused, for the eggs were then hidden, within them, candies from leading brands. Hippitus Hoppitus.

Hohoho. Mew meow mow Solo.

Get yourself a clown girlfriend. Or don’t. What do I know?

Do you moo, sir?

I do moo.

But do you moo at ME, sir?!

This dame was a vampire, and flew in on the five fifteen.

WAT.

I wonder if there could be a solution where there’s an insert with built in pipe cleaner thingies for the dishwasher, and when you load them up and turn the dishwasher on, it goes WOOSH WOOSH and then it’s clean.

THICC

(Sad trombone sound)

This sounds like a gag from the Roadrunner cartoon.

“Look it might be a waste of a lock, but I don’t want some vampire kid killing me. Don’t let your last words be, ‘I should have listened to Jeeeeeeff!’”

Why are you here soldier?
“I want to make a difference!”
Why are you REALLY here soldier!?
“…I want big ol tiddies.”
Don’t you EVER forget that.

The high level of illumination guided an airborne sled at night!