Wow! With vpn on (as usual) I get tons of other people’s stuff - almost entirely movies and TV, lots of Bluey episodes in particular? Makes sense I don’t see anything of mine, bc I haven’t torrented anything in the past few days. When I turned the vpn off, nothing showed up. I suspected my rommate wouldn’t be torrenting bc he always asks me to do it for him lol, he’s less tech savvy, but it would be funny if something of his actually did show up.
A few main issues contributed: the commute was 1.5-2h each way. The pay was low, and the raises that kept being hinted at never materialized. And the supervisor… picture this: you’re in your mid 20’s,and your supervisor is the same age as you. He was clearly only made supervisor because he’s good at the work he used to do, not because he has any leadership skills. He doesn’t seem to enjoy being in management, and is responsible for a solid 90% of all workplace hostility. He’s not exactly mean or anything, but definitely way too intense. Despite having done the same work you’re doing, his expectations seem maybe impossible? His work is his life and he brags about things like working on Christmas.
There were a lot of things I genuinely liked about the job, but after a time my mental health was the worst it had ever been. It’s the only time I’ve genuinely felt suicidal at all, as in, not intrusive thoughts, but actual desire. I had so little spare time because of the commute, but couldn’t afford to move closer. I knew I had to leave the job and was frequently applying for other jobs but hadn’t had any success yet. I was too scared of not having another job lined up.
Then I went and hung out with an old coworker from a restaurant I had worked at in the past, and I found out the dishwasher there had a higher hourly wage than I did at my STEM job that required a degree - it was a pretty fancy restaurant but still… Within like two or three days (I think, although I was dissociating a lot so it’s hard to say) I had my resignation letter turned in, and I was ready to leave and never look back.
When I was a kid they were almost always like movies - I wasn’t involved at all, just watching things play out. Sometimes they would be first person though. In early adulthood it flipped, now they’re almost always first person.