David, that’s the fourth milf. We’re definitely going the wrong way!

I think I finally understand the term “anchor babies”.

I’ve never been put under, but I just assumed OP meant that they would say something right before they started counting, not after.

“I want my last words to be funny, so try not to laugh.”

Wow, pigeons really taking a beating in this conversation.

In this case, raw is a misnomer. The packaging on the cashews says raw, but that just means they haven’t been roasted. They were still steamed, to neutralize the poison.

My mom left some plain potato chips at my place shortly after I moved in. I wasn’t going to eat them, so every few days, when I saw some crows sitting on the telephone line in the backyard, I’d leave a chip or two so they’d like me. But I knew it wasn’t healthy for them so when the bag ran out, I got some raw unsalted cashews and started leaving those instead. The crows stopped coming to my backyard almost immediately. I know the nuts and seeds are healthier, but I think they only wanted the tasty food with no nutritional content. Same, crows. Same.